Joke Of The Day!!!!!

[Granny]

A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license. First,

of course, he had to take an eye sight test. The optician showed him a card

with the letters:

'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'

"Can you read this?" the optician asked.

"Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy."

[jazzieal]

Hello, is this the Sheriff's Office?"
Yes. What can I do for you?"
I'm calling to report 'bout my neighbor Virgil Smith.... He's hidin'
marijuana inside his firewood! Don't quite know how he gets it
inside them logs, but he's hidin' it there."
Thank you very much for the call, sir."
The next day, the Sheriff's Deputies descend on Virgil's house. They
search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open
every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They sneer at Virgil and leave.
Shortly, the phone rings at Virgil's house.
Hey, Virgil! This here's Floyd.... did the Sheriff come?"
"Yeah!"
"Did they chop your firewood?"
"Yep!"


"Happy Birthday, buddy!"
(Rednecks know how to Git-R-Dun)

[*eng*]

LOl very good Jazz!

[makeyesup]

This is not a joke, but a great video of two otters in love. Gives you a happy feeling.



http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overl...id_not_ju.html

[*eng*]

This was on the news here today! So sweet

[mswizard]

This is a warning to all you peeps on this forum thread:

DO NOT...I repeat....DO NOT drink coffee or any other hot beverage while reading these darned jokes....could be VERY hazzardus to your health let alone your monitor and keyboard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[mswizard]

A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license. First,

of course, he had to take an eye sight test. The optician showed him a card

with the letters:

'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'

"Can you read this?" the optician asked.

"Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy."

Im Polish and this was so cute I had to send it to everyone I could think of in my family!!!!

THANKS!!!!!

[crops2dawn]

OMG this is soooooooo funny! I love it! Keep em coming, I make sure I go to the bathroom, before reading these!

[pkdoll]

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.

The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.

He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.

Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.

The blonde started laughing.

This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.

This time the blonde laughed even harder.

Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.

The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.

The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"

[pkdoll]

Some possible computer bumper stickers
1. BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding

2. <-------- The information went data way

3. The name is Baud...James Baud.

4. BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!

5. Access denied--nah nah na nah nah!

6. C:V> Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.

7. Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)

8. Backups? We don' *NEED* no steenking backups.

9. E Pluribus Modem

10. .... File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)

11. Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny

12. CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C (Y/N)?

13. 11th commandment - Covet not thy neighbor's Pentium.

14. Windows: Just another pane in the glass.

15. SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . .

16. RAM disk is *not* an installation procedure.

17. Smash forehead on keyboard to continue...

18. COFFEE.EXE Missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key

19. ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!

20. E-mail returned to sender -- insufficient voltage.

21. Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.

22. "640K ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill Gates, 1981

23. Press any key... no, no, no, NOT THAT ONE!

24. Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...

25. REALITY.SYS corrupted: Reboot universe? (Y/N/Q)

26. Error reading FAT record: Try the SKINNY one? (Y/N)

27. Hit any user to continue.

28. Disk Full - Press F1 to belch.

29. Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (P)anic

30. (A)bort, (R)etry, (G)et a beer?